"What are you doing? I would appreciate it if you would wait to hit the bottle until after my class!"
Heather's math TA

"Why wouldn't they pardon the Ramadan turkey?!?!?!"
Nick Charles

"They should make vitamin infused ice cream. Then I'd never have to eat anything else."
"Because taking a multivitamin is too fucking hard?"
"It means there is less room for ice cream!"

Heather and Nick

"You like people to eat proletariat mustard and then shit on your face, don't you? Fuckin' Commies."
Heather's analysis of Nick

"You're like a MOOSE!"
Nick, on heather's impressive feats of strength

"You don't usually need an AK-47 at the stock market. But who knows? These are crazy times."
Heather

"oh baby, integrate my curve!"
"Not unless you find my limit first"
-Amy, Saad, calc rocks my fucking knee socks off

"Now what the hell is that? I have low self esteem and I am awesome!"
Heather

"If anything had happened, I suppose it would have been juicy indeed."
"The LAST thing i want to think about, horny as i may be, is nick and your bloody creamy redish brown love juices after a night of hot menstrual sex!"
Heather, Stephen

"I'm not a fucking Etch-a-Sketch!"
Nick Charles

"Nick Charles is quipular."
Heather

"They manage to be both sisterly and erotic. It's hot."
Stephen, on Amy and Heather

"it's like an orgasm in your mouth, but without the fishy flavor"
Heather, on Panera's Panini sandwiches (and written on a comment card)

"I'm too laz to add the y."
-Heather

"Making you orgasm is my new hobby, by the way."
-Anon.

"I'm taking the greyhound to sex town."
Jim

"You're going to fall more and more in love with me, until one day you realize you're in hell."
Amy to Steve